Bonusode 64.1: Giants are on a Skid

EVERYTHING IS OK! THERE IS NOTHING TO SEE HERE! BACK AWAY FROM THE ORANGE AND BLACK-CLAD BASEBALL TEAM VERY SLOWLY!!

Hello everyone! Nothing to see here! The Giants are in first place! Don’t worry! Unicorns farting rainbows of denial!!

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[audio http://torturecast.podomatic.com/enclosure/2014-06-19T12_26_15-07_00.mp3]

The Giants are in first. There were also in first when we recorded this special bonusode with Ally and Jen almost a week ago after they lost the first of 3 in horrible fashion to those purple-clad lucky SOBs. The Giants are still in first place. Why do we all feel so bad? Because we’re Giants fans!!

…the Giants are still in first place, the Giants are still in first place, the Giants are still in first place……

Now, where did I put my oxycontin?

Chad

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Rockies vs. Giants; 6/13 Recap

I had a nice 4 paragraph story all written up, going into the ninth inning with a 4-2 Giants lead and after 16 consecutive Rockies had been retired by Lincecum and the bullpen.

Then Romo came in to save it, and this is what happened to their lead and my story:

Giants lost 7-4. Go read someone else’s account….

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Episode 64: Joe Martinez

No one would have remembered this guy if it weren’t for the line drive off his head. But, we’re running out of jersey numbers…

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Joe Martinez. He pitched in a total of 21 games over 4 season, some of which were with the Giants. Yes, lament as we run out of jersey numbers but celebrate as we talk about the team with the BEST RECORD IN BASEBALL. That’s right, the Giants haven’t started off this good since 1962, before all of us were born.

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2 out hits (with RISP)

Thanks, @2outhits

The Giants are hitting a paltry .232 with 2 outs.

However, when they have runners in scoring position, they’re hitting .299, best in the MLB. Not surprisingly, they also lead the MLB in SLG, OBP and OPS in that situation.

The Giants?

Yes, indeed, the 2 out, RISP matra is shattering the internetz and Twitter. The Giants’ ability to hit the ball with 2 outs and runners in scoring position has propelled them to the best record in all of Major League Baseball, and by a full 3 games, might we add.

 

More tidbits:

At this time last year, the Giants were 29-26 and 1.5 GB. That’s 7 GB of where they are now. Of course, the Dodgers were 6.5 GB and in last place

If MLB standing were one: SF with the best record:  Mil 3 GB Det 3.5 GB Oak 3.5 GB Tor 4.5 GB LAA 5 GB Atl 6.5 GB NYY 7 GB StL 7 GB LAD 7 GB Mia 7.5 GB Col 7.5 GB

Over the last 4 years, the #SFGiants haven’t had more than 29 wins entering June. They have 36 NOW. (29 in ’11and ’13, 27 in ’10 and ’12)

Last 4 seasons when #SFGiants got to 36 W: 2013: 6/18, 2012: 6/14, 2011: 6/10, 2010: 6/14

OPS w/2 outs and RISP is almost 100 points higher than second place! (0.874 vs Mia and Tex at 0.777)

More stats with runners in scoring position and 2 outs: #SFGiants lead MLB with .299 BA, .482 SLG, .874 OPS. .391 OBP.

The #SFGiants now lead MLB in batting average with 2 outs and runners in scoring position at .299. 2nd is Miami at .283.

 

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Episode 63: Jean Machi

Machi ain’t stinkin’ it up like last year.

Start streaming our latest episode, or download it here:

[audio http://torturecast.podomatic.com/enclosure/2014-05-26T23_20_40-07_00.mp3]

In the first solo TortureCast, Chad attempts to substitute rum and coke and brevity for the lack of conversation. Hey, the Giants have the BEST RECORD IN ALL OF BASEBALL, and we, er, Chad, needs to talk about it, as it may go south at any time. Also, Panda’s hot, Posey’s not, and MLB.com gives the Giants an 88.6% chance of making the postseason.

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Episode 62: Bob Howry

Seriously, does anyone remember Bob?

Yeah, I know, we’re running out of memorable Giants with our jersey numbers. We’ll have to switch to a different base value for these numbers, just to make sure you won’t throw knives at us.

Play the podcast below, or download it here:

[audio http://torturecast.podomatic.com/enclosure/2014-05-19T23_44_46-07_00.mp3]

Ben and Chad get together to talk about the team with the best record in the National League, at least for now. That’s right, your San Francisco Giants have exceeded many expectations thus far.

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Episode 61: Livan Hernandez

It was the best of times, it was the worst and worser of times….

Click play below to stream Episode 61, or download it here!

[audio http://torturecast.podomatic.com/enclosure/2014-05-13T00_43_29-07_00.mp3]

Willie and Chad talk about the great first quarter of the 2014 season, which finds the Giants in first place and somehow FOX sports ranks them as the best team in the MLB. We also discuss the Belt injury, entities we hate, and our new favorite guys.

 

 

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Kuiper Bobbleheads and Double Rainbows

I only see one...

I only see one…

I was in the press box for game 1 against Cleveland. I live in Gilroy. It was raining very hard in the early afternoon. I wasn’t sure if I should go. Well, I put my stock into weather.com and made the drive up north through pouring rain. It let up near the park, and as of the 2nd inning, it hasn’t rained since 4pm. Maybe I do have to buy stock in weather.com.

Due to the rain, there was no batting practice, and my credentials don’t allow clubhouse access, so no questions fired at Bochy before the game. Apparently I’m scum when it comes to the 2 levels of press access. But, I ain’t hatin’.

Act 1

The Giants came into today not having a single non-homerun-driven-in-run in 6 days. That was quickly alleviated when Hunter Pence drove in Angel Pagan with his first triple of the year before an out was recorded in the bottom of the first. Pagan had led off the game with a single. Morse followed two batters later by knocking in Pence with a sacrifice fly to deep right to make it 2-0.

Another first was a walk by Tim Hudson. After 30 2/3 inning to start the season without a walk, he gave up his first free pass of the year to Carlos Santana with 2 outs in the first.

The Indians finally got on the board in the third when Michael Bourn sent one high off the bricks in right. Pence appeared to mishandle the carom, which allowed Bourn to take third, but it was officially scored a triple. Nick Swisher followed with a clean line drive single to right center to halve the lead at 2-1.

Pagan and Pence kept their night perfect when Pagan, with extreme bat control, poked a single to left and promptly swiped second. Pence raised his average to .256 with a single to right to drive in the Giants’ centerfielder to make it a 3-1 game.

Act 2

Michael “BEAST” Morse (he wore a BEAST orange t-shirt before the game to continue his moniker from Washington) tattooed a ball to right center field, well up into the seats to lead off the fourth and extend San Francisco’s lead to 4-1. This is Bonds’ territory, and he’s a RIGHT hander. He may just be the first right hander to get a Splash Hit.

Tim Hudson really settled into a groove, and at one point, had retired 9 batters in a row until Kipnis singled with one out in the sixth. After his second walk of the game and of the season, Hudson struck out Brantley, which was followed by a line drive smash by Cabrera which was snagged by Belt lunging to his right to end the inning, preserving the lead.

Carrasco settled down after the Morse homerun, though, retiring 9 consecutive Giants to close out the 6th. Brandon Belt struck out for the third time in as many at bats, but his defense at that point, had made up for the lack of contact.

Act 3

After Affeldt was not needed in the 6th after warming up, Tim Hudson pitched into the seventh, easily retiring the side in order on 8 pitches.

Pablo Sandoval led off the seventh and switched around to the right side with “I think it’s 1982 and I’ll wear my high white socks and stirrups” Josh Outman facing him. Pablo, who’s 0-41 this season with 2 strikes, took the first pitch off of arcade #2 in right field for a rare Panda triple. Crawford smoked a single to right field to drive him in. Crawford is not 10-22 off of left handers, and that be a sign of plate maturity for the young shortstop. Hudson was lifted for a pinch hitter (Blanco) in the bottom of the seventh, concluding Huddy’s night at 7 IP, 1 ER, 4 H, and 2 walks

Jeremy Affeldt had a rocky start to the top of the 8th, though, allowing a leadoff walk, and after a bizarre delay of game for a repair job that he requested to the pitcher’s landing spot, Kipnis laced a single to center. Affeldt summoned the powers of his not-yet-cut-while-making-hamburgers left hand to retire the next 3 hitters, the last 2 on strikeouts.

The ninth inning wasn’t a clean one for the Giants, as it included an error by Hunter Pence and a botched double play on a combacker to Javier Lopez, but alas, the 4-run cushion was more than ample to prevent any serious torture as he closed out a 5-1 win, pushing Hudson’s record to 3-1.

Chad

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Episode #60: Wilson Delgado

He’s actually younger than me.

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Given the fact that the Giants scored only 3 runs in the first two games of the series in Colorado, I’d want to check the teams’ prostates. Apparently, they’re all in good health, at least, that’s what they want to publish on the internet. Because, cancer afflicting multimillionaire owners is bad pub. Right? #60 is a hard number to fulfill. Yet, the internet reveals such Giants as Wilson Delgado. I love reminiscing. However, the Giants finished their road trip at 2-4. Pathetic. But, if it weren’t for the Giants’ 6 homeruns on Wednesday, they might be sitting under .500. Alas, the Wilson Delgado fan club still exists within the confines of 1998. Internet broadband isn’t strong enough to deny access to the fountain.

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Don’t. Press. It.

…don’t press it…don’t press it…don’t press it….

 

Still above .500. Only 1 1/2 games back. No need to worry, right?

Big picture, who knows?

But, if recent history becomes a long summer of a trend, we’re in for a repeat of the 2013 season of mediocrity.

It’s only been a week since the precipitous fall from grace the Giants’ bats have taken, in fact, I think I saw several players actually chucking their bats off the Rocky Mountains after these last two miserable games.

SF has lost 5 of 6, and aside from Vogelsong’s start in Colorado, the pitching has been excellent and not to blame. You can put that squarely on the shoulders of the lineup, and aside from Belt and Pagan (but even Pagan has been quiet lately), everyone has shut down. Once the Giants were second in the NL in batting average and runs scored. Oh, so as the memories of when you got to second base with that blonde you were after in high school, so are the days of the Giants EVEN GETTING TO THE REAL ACTUAL SECOND BASE!

Let’s take a look at the big picture, stat-wise. The Giants have now fallen to second to last in the NL in batting average to almost my weight: .228. Only the Mets are worse at .224. We thought the Giants had scoring problems last year, but they still hit a relatively robust .260! Usually the runs are plentiful on both sides in Colorado, a veritable buffet where only the mightiest of the champion food eaters will come out on top, while the other, although defeated, still gets his full of extra base hits. True to the park, the giants have had 19 at bats with runners in scoring position in the first 2 games. That’s a crap-metric-ton of at bats! They’ve put runners on base! How many hits in those 19 ABs? Exactly 1: by Hunter Pence: AND IT DIDN’T EVEN SCORE A RUN! I might be able to get more than 1 hit in 19 at bats by just poking out the bat every pitch.

The runs have dried up, the hitting has dried up, my drink has dried up while I write this. Alas, the pitching is still in tact, despite some bumps in the road, and those bumps tend to be Giants fans running over Vogelsong with their metaphorical buses filled with toxic angst, rage, and maybe an occasional enchilada. There have been many questions about Vogey coming in. Some have predicted that he may not make it to June as a starter. I’m pulling for the guy, he’s a great story, and an inspirational one at that. A blue-collar type you want to see succeed, but his location has been off so far this year, the same affliction he suffered last year. With Petit shaking off the rust and pitching well, we may see a change in a month if Ryan continues to go south. Cain and Hudson have been great, and Bumgarner won an entire game himself with 5 RBI, but he has been hit HARD. Today he pitched a complete game (8 IP) and only allowed 2 solo jacks for runs, but still got tagged with the loss. The league is now hitting .314 off Madison, who happens to be tied with Lincecum for the 5th worst batting average against in the NL. This, this is not a good sign, despite his 3.14 ERA. He’s playing with fire by allowing all of those baserunners (Bum owns a 1.64 WHIP, 55th out of 58 qualifying pitchers).

Seriously, 3 runs for the Giants in 2 games in Denver. They’re passing runs out in the stands. Last night was “free runs” night. I think I even saw an elderly man score with that young blonde I was after in high school. What kind of offense is this team going to bring back to the thick air by the Bay on Friday versus Cleveland?!

By the way, Willie and Chad will be in the press box on Friday versus Cleveland to keep both an eye out for that blonde, Kuiper bobbleheads, and for any runs that may or may not score in the home half.

Chad

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